A Yakuza-linked Hostess Club Owner Takes me on a Man Date
Racism and Acceptance in Japanese Night Life.
From a young age I held this stereotype that Japanese people were quiet, emotionally reserved and definitely not at American levels of extroverted exuberance.
That image was shattered the first time I saw a summer festival. Old men wrapped their arms around me and forced me to drink sake. One guy jumped in front of my car and asked me to drive him home. Groups of young yankee gave me free beer and fried chicken. Seeing men riding shrines and yelling at the crowds with feral ferocity made me think that I was the timid one.
The place I saw the most outgoing behavior was in seedy nightlife places. From normal bars to hostess clubs, to even just the streets around them.
One time I was walking the arcades of Fukuoka as a young and chipper 20 something exchange student, just happy to be alive and in Japan. These 2 hostesses drunkenly bumped into me, linked arms with me one on either side, and took me to their club.
For hostesses, you pay for their drinks for a certain time and they flirt with you. That “should be” it, usually is, and was all I was looking forward to that night because why not.
We were having a great time laughing up the streets until we got to the place. The owner met us and barred his arms like an X and said no foreigners. I asked him why, in Japanese, and he said because you can’t speak Japanese…..hmmm. The girls looked embarrassed and apologized to me as I left, confused and honestly a little hurt.
Even though not being allowed into places sucks, it’s also how I met my first, and so far only, legit Yakuza member. Or, at least I’m 90% sure he was Yakuza affiliated.
Not being allowed in certain places sucks, but it’s also how I met my first, and so far only, legit Yakuza member. Or, at least I’m 90% sure he was Yakuza affiliated.
Kindness of a Shady Dude
I used to live up north in the region of Tohoku. My company at the time had their headquarters in Morioka so I ended up spending a few weekends a year there.
Love that place.
If you live in Tokyo, Morioka is nothing special city wise. But if you lived in the boonies like I did, Morioka is the New Jerusalem.
The had Starbucks! And movie theaters! And nightclubs! Amazing. Where I was living in Aomori had….rice fields! Trees! Bears! Both great depending on your life stage though.
My stage at the time was: meet girls. Full stop. That was all I cared about back then. So the night in question I hit some clubs and bars, to no avail, and eventually found myself at the Rubber Ducky bar.
I only call it this because when the owner opened the door for me he had a rubber ducky taped to his head. Despite what should've been a hilarious first meeting with him, he barred his arms like an X and said the dreaded words
“no foreigners.”
I tried to ask why. He pretended he didn’t even hear me and closed the door.
The fuck? This was a normal bar. Nothing shady about it like the well known places that could shut me out. I was simply denied access because I wasn’t Japanese. This one hurt. This also angered me deeply. Steaming, I walked away, made it down the staircase, and across the street.
All of a sudden I felt a hand on my shoulder.
Turning around I saw a Japanese man, early 30’s, in an very expensive looking suit. He had boy band hair, gold earrings, a deep tan.
Boy Band Guy (BBG): “Sorry about what happened back there at the bar. Come back and I’ll buy you a drink.”
I thought he worked for the bar. So I said “nah man, don’t want to have anything to do with your place.”
BBG: “I’m a customer there. You won’t have any more problems. Come.”
I weighed my options and settled on seeing what would happen. Upon entering the Rubber Ducky, the owner was on his knees bowing to me so low the ducky touched the floor.
There were about 10 other guys in this bar all death staring at the guy as he groveled. I said “no problem, I’m over it.” Mainly because it looked like this man was about to get murdered.
BBG guides me to his table where one of the few women in the entire bar, a knockout beauty, let’s call her Aina, takes my hand and sits next to me giggling.
Where the fuck am I?
BBG commands the owner to bring over some drinks and the guy sprints to work. BBG introduces himself as Koji.
Me: “so what kind of work do you do?”
Koji: “I own the cabaret club.”
Me: “which one?”
Koji: “all of them in the city.”
Cabarets are basically like hostess clubs. Aina, the smiling girl next to me, was his best girl. I asked her why she was here tonight.
Aina: “It’s my birthday!”
Me: “So your birthday party is just hanging out with your boss and his guy friends?”
Aina: “Of course.”
The other 10 guys at the bar started getting rowdy. They demanded that the owner lock the front door. He does. There are no windows, no escape. One the biggest guys takes off all his clothes, down to his underwear, revealing a massive Yakuza-esque back tattoo.
Naked Guy: “ Hey gaijin (foreigner) take my picture”
I oblige. Then another guy gets naked and the two of them start sumo wrestling in the bar, throwing each other over tables and knocking drinks everywhere.
I had a blast. Aina was cozied up next to me making conversation all night. I’m sure she probably didn’t want to be there on her birthday, but I’m sure she also didn’t have much of a choice if she wanted to keep her job.
When I got up to leave I expected to pay something at least. I guess the total bill for me would have been about $200. Koji waves me off saying its covered. Aina walks me outside, with Koji, so I don’t go for a kiss or anything. They both wave me off and I drunkenly stumble back to my hotel at 5 AM, thoroughly satisfied with the night.
I had traded Line (chat app) with Koji but never thought I would see him again. I lived 150 miles away and when I came to the city I had other people that took priority to meet.
A Second Chance Encounter
A few months later I was in the city of Hachinohe, Aomori. Its slightly closer to Morioka but still over 100 miles away. I was just visiting, doing my thing bouncing from bars to clubs and walking the streets.
Then a hand falls on my shoulder. It was freakin Koji!
We talk a bit about how weird it was to randomly run into each other, Hachinohe is not a happening place compared to Morioka. Koji said he was there to manage some more of his cabaret clubs. This dude owned dozens of clubs spread out over multiple prefectures.
Koji: “Nomi ni ikou”, lets go drink.
I say sure but I don’t have much money we could just hit up some normal bars. He says no, he’ll cover me again.
I’m not the kind of guy who feigns reluctance when somebody offers something. You offer me the last donut, I’ll snatch it up with a thanks and no shame. Koji ended up spending $500 on me that night.
He takes me to a hostess club. I think why not, he’s paying I’ll just have fun.
The first two girls sit down with us and we start drinking and chatting it up. At least I did with my girl. I didn’t care if she wasn’t my type or wasn’t authentically complimenting me, I decided to just enjoy the night.
Koji though, didn’t like his girl. He turns to the manager walking by and says:
This girl is ugly. Go get me another.
Wow. Didn’t see that coming. I was pinged with shame. Never would I so callously have a person rotated out like a commodity. I said goodbye to both girls and tried to leave them with smile at least.
Two new girls sit down with us and I guess Koji liked the news ones better. I kinda died inside.
We left and hit up a night club. Me being the only foreigner in the city it felt like, I was used to getting a lot of attention when I first walked into places. That didn’t necessarily translate into dating success, but it didn’t hurt either.
Pretty soon I brought these 2 hot girls over to our table and got them drinks. Me, I’m just enjoying life. Koji is aloof the entire time and never really shows any charisma or interest in the girl next to him. regardless, our little group was having a blast.
I went to the bathroom and when I came back both girls were gone and talking to 2 new guys across the club.
Me: Koji what happened?
Koji: I said we should all leave now and go fuck. They said no so I said get lost.
There was no playful banter, no fun being had here. He was a guy used to just commanding people to do things and tossing them out when they wouldn’t.
I need to ditch Koji ASAP.
But I felt obliged to him in some way because, despite being a dick to everyone else, he never was like that to me. That doesn’t mean you need to stick with someone whose values don’t align with yours though, no matter how much they’ve done for you in the past.
I decided to go get one last drink with him at a normal bar and then part ways. He says he knows a place and leads me down dark, dingy and piss smelling alleys.
We get to a decent looking bar and sit down. The barmaid comes over and knows Koji. He says to me, “if you want to touch her boobs she’ll let you.” And then proceeds to show me. I’m a little uncomfortable with gift so I decline.
After our last drink I’m thinking, “well, its been great and not great but now is the time to end this.” Koji puts him around me and says, “you know, when male rabbits can’t find a female to mate with they just pretend like one of them is a girl.”
…..
…..
That’s my cue to cut and run if ever I’ve had one before. I thank him for the offer and for the drinks and walk away.
Final thoughts
To be fair, I almost never run into the “no foreigners allowed” racist bs attitude in my day to day in Japan. Most businesses and most people will gladly let anyone into their space. But the bar to entry does crop up every so often.
Especially in seedy night life areas. You’ll see tons of places that you can’t enter if you don’t have the right “blood.” Maybe that’s for the best with most of them though.
And even more rare, you’ll see the lone antique shop, hot spring, or bar that won’t let you in. But even in the depths of xenophobic territory you can also find heroic, gangster affiliated, womanizing nd also somehow kind defenders of racial equality.